Saturday, October 14, 2006

Odds and ends

A short shift today, and a strange assortment too.

The yardman puked in the warehouse on an industrial scale. Now we know that there's some kind of stomach bug doing the rounds. By rights we should have been shut down by health and safety or trading standards or someone else (by ourselves?) but we remained open for business and did brisk business for the remainder of the afternoon.

A presumably male customer failed to aim accurately in the sit down area of the men's toilets; leaving an unfortunate (and by the end distressed) member of staff having to clean up the crap.

Just after lunch the ISDN line that carries card transaction traffic threw a fit and had to be re-booted or whatever it is that BT boffins do under such circumstances. The cards were 'down' for the best part of an hour, but the cash machine had been re-stoked and was particularly popular.

One of the supervisors managed somehow to achieve the impossible and get a finger jammed inside the manual swipe machine which we were left having to use while the cards were down. Have a look at one if you ever get the chance and try to imagine fitting an adult sized finger into a space designed to take a credit card and three sheets of paper.

The Grape Thief was in. She's a scawny woman of indeterminate age who comes in with a basket. She picks up two bags of red grapes and a bit of milk plus perhaps one or two other items. She then wanders about the store for about half an hour consuming the grapes from one of the bags, transfering any tell-tale empty vine to the other bag. Then she gets to the checkout, discovers she's got hardly any cash on her and leaves behind all but the tiny residual bag of grapes and perhaps a pint of milk.

Our Bakery manager spotted her and reported her. Nothing was done. I had to listen to him complain about that for about an hour.

Then he went off and bought a scratch card from the lottery kiosk and won £100. So I had to listen to him boast about that for the rest of my shift.

Our syndicate did not win a bean in last night's massive EuroMillions draw so there's some chance that some staff will turn up for work tomorrow - on the other hand nobody else has won all that filthy lucre so there's still that very faint outside chance that none of us will have to turn up for work next week.


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